I am that type of douchebag friend who doesn’t talk with you for weeks but still cares about you and hopes you still care too.
Basically every day I end up staring at a list of friends I have online. I know I could probably message one of them, but I don’t. I always seem to have a reason not to message someone. Which then leaves me feeling lonely and I guess it’s by choice .. But the reasoning is something I don’t even believe yet there it goes just running my life. Something like “You’ll be bothering them, leave them be maybe they’ll talk to you out of the blue.” Or “They don’t want to put up with any of your shit, even if you’re just saying hi.” And it goes on. HahahahhA. Why this.
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SO. Still playing FF. Been back a couple of days and shot up from level 31 to 42. Getting closer to 50.. Also RPing more which is always fun. I need more friends though my bae is such a loner like fuck. Play with meeeee. Balmung Legacy Serverrrr <3
At this point, I’m not sure what or where I am anymore. I continue to try and understand, by mapping out my path to where I am now .. But why did I end up here? Was I just too lazy and withdrawn to actually try? I don’t know if I even gave up or trying. Like, that’s how confused I am.
I don’t feel like I have emotional connections to anyone anymore. And I think that’s what leaves me lost. I’ve never been a leader, I’ve always followed and learned and acted in example of the one I followed. I truly felt I could become a better person that way. But then they either get tired of holding my hand or I think I just gave up.. I don’t know what happens. I don’t remember.
I never remember what’s important anymore.
— Good news: it’s you. (via poppyflowerpoetry)
imagine your OTP having lazy saturday morning sex, eyes half open, early-morning sun washing across the bed, sheets tangled around their legs. it’s nothing too intense, warmth and messy tenderness, faces buried into each other’s necks and pleasure shivering down their spines